At its core, trust is about the uncertainty of what people will do. To be trustworthy is to be predictable. Can you reliably predict what others are going to do? Can others reliably predict what you are going to do?
On the Use of Force
For the person using force, it is voluntary. It is the ultimate expression of one-sided decision-making, where one’s personal power is unilaterally utilized. But for the person force is used against, choice is denied. Force is coercive, and that coercion is force’s trademark. It is the attempt to impose one person’s decision upon someone else. Force, therefore, contains a sense of irony. It is the use of one’s self-autonomy to deny another of their self-autonomy.
Talking At, Not With: The Problem of Disconnected Conversations
Ever watch two people having a conversation, and neither of them are talking about the same thing?
A while back, I was having a conversation with a friend about politics. It started off pretty even keeled, but the longer we talked the more heated it became. I would make a point. My friend would make a point. Then I would make another point. Then so would my friend. And so that cycle of point-counterpoint continued, each of us building up our points as if there were an imaginary judge that would declare a winner.
I Like It When I’m Right, Except When I’m Wrong
Everyone Has Their Reasons: Be Wary of Labeling Others as Irrational
“It just doesn’t make sense.”
“They’re acting against their own interests.”
“I’m sure they’ll listen to reason.”
“They’re being irrational.”
How often do you hear people use these kinds of phrases? How often do you hear people describe those they disagree with, or don’t quite understand, as being “irrational?” When we call someone irrational, we lose the opportunity to gain a deeper understanding of that individual’s values. In essence, we write that person off.